Slowing Down to Trust: Body Awareness and Overcoming Defenses in Healing Conversations

In a world where speed is often equated with success, we’re conditioned to keep moving, achieving, and striving for the next thing. The pace of life can easily become overwhelming, and without realizing it, we disconnect from our own internal guidance systems—the wisdom of our bodies. Yet, there’s a profound truth many of us overlook: slowing down is essential for self-trust and true healing.

Many of us operate from an image of who we think we should be, a version of ourselves shaped by societal expectations, pressures, and our own internal critic. This image drives us to move at a pace that’s not necessarily aligned with what we truly need. Over time, we lose touch with the subtle signals our bodies give us—the signals that offer guidance, safety, and the ability to navigate life authentically.

As we start to listen more closely to our bodies, we realize something important: we don’t need to dive headfirst into every situation. Like dipping a toe into water to test the temperature, our nervous system thrives when given space to gently ease into new experiences. Slowing down is an invitation to trust our body’s cues rather than push past them, and in doing so, we free ourselves from the tyranny of judgment and self-criticism.

The Body as an Instrument of Perception

For many of us, myself included, this realization didn’t come easily. I’ve lived much of my life at full speed, receiving feedback at various stages that I needed to “slow the F down.” It wasn’t until later in life that I truly began to embrace this wisdom. What I discovered through both personal experience and working with clients is that our bodies are far more than vessels we inhabit. They are finely tuned instruments of perception, capable of providing us with invaluable feedback if we’re willing to listen.

When we slow down, we create space to notice what’s really happening. Our bodies become the compass, guiding us through our day-to-day lives as well as our deeper emotional landscapes. Instead of trying to think our way through situations—which often leads to stumbling and frustration—we can begin to feel our way through them. And that shift in perspective changes everything.

I’ve been reading a book called New Self, New World by Philip Shepherd, which describes this process in a beautiful metaphor. The author recounts a conversation between an ant and a millipede. The ant, in awe of how the millipede moves with so many legs, asks how it knows which leg to move first. The millipede, upon thinking about the question, becomes paralyzed, unable to move at all. The wisdom of the millipede’s movement doesn’t come from its thinking brain; it comes from its body’s innate intelligence. When we slow down and reconnect with our own bodies, we can trust in this same deep wisdom.

Recognizing Defenses

One of the most transformative effects of slowing down is how it allows us to meet our defenses with compassion rather than resistance. When we’re moving too fast or stuck in our heads, defensive patterns often take over without us even realizing it. These defenses are autopilot responses that have developed over time to protect us, but when they go unchecked, they can lead us away from truth, presence, and connection with ourselves and others.

When we slow down and breathe, we create the space to shake hands with these defenses instead of fighting them. We get to see them for what they are: automatic patterns, not evidence of failure or unworthiness. Slowing down offers us the opportunity to approach these defenses with curiosity rather than judgment. We can differentiate between the autopilot response and our authentic truth.

Trusting ourselves in these moments is key. Our defenses are not something to be ashamed of; they are simply strategies we’ve developed to navigate life. By slowing down, we create the conditions for a new relationship with these patterns. We can breathe, pause, and reflect—allowing us to choose a different way of being rather than defaulting to old habits.

The Power of Compassionate Awareness

In this process, compassion is essential. When we move slowly, we are more likely to meet ourselves with kindness instead of self-criticism. This shift allows us to engage in a dialogue with the parts of ourselves that we might otherwise ignore or suppress. When we criticize or rush through our experiences, we deepen the divide between ourselves and our truth. But when we slow down, we create the space to listen—and that act of listening is an act of love.

Over time, this practice of slowing down, listening, and trusting our bodies helps us navigate life with greater clarity and ease. It builds a foundation of self-trust that not only supports our personal growth but also enhances our relationships with others. We become more present, more compassionate, and more connected to the moment.

Trusting the Body in Healing Work

As a practitioner, I’ve seen time and time again how this approach changes the dynamic in therapeutic work. Clients who are accustomed to intellectualizing their experiences often discover new depths of healing when they learn to feel their way through a session. Instead of trying to figure out what’s wrong or how to fix it, we practice staying with the felt sense of what’s happening in the body. This somatic approach opens up new possibilities for healing that are simply not available when we stay stuck in the mind.

Slowing down in this way allows us to be more attuned not just to ourselves but also to those we work with. As therapists, coaches, or even in our day-to-day interactions, cultivating this awareness deepens our connection and helps us navigate the complexities of human relationships. It is from this place of embodied presence that true healing can unfold.

Final Thoughts

Slowing down is more than just a self-care practice—it’s a radical act of trust. It’s a way of honoring the wisdom of the body and acknowledging that we don’t have to rush through life to get it right. In fact, it’s the opposite. The slower we move, the more we can feel, and the more we feel, the more we can trust that the answers we seek are already within us.

When we take the time to slow down, we not only reconnect with ourselves, but we also open the door to deeper, more meaningful relationships with others. In this slowing down, we find the space to live authentically, with greater compassion, trust, and presence.

Click here for the recorded conversation between me and Morgan Scheurich, CCEP, that inspired this post.